White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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