what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize