You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Randomize
