do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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