dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize