Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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