wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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