Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
