you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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