just come out here and I will go home with you...
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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