I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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