Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Randomize