Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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