He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
