how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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