What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Randomize
