at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I have peed in a lot of sinks
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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