I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize
