I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I wish i was in the wii world.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
