Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
