Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
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