shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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