No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
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