So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
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