So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i already hear my dad disowning me
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
