just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Randomize
