We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
someone owes me an orgasm
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I checked into jail on foursquare
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
