Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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