I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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