...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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