she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
