Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
