That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
