I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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