I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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