The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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