school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize