Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
