Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
