I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Text me some of your sweat
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Randomize
