So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize