matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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