found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Randomize
