Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
