I'm drive I can fine osifer
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Randomize
