Whod you bang
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize