was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
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