I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
