I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
