At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
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